Fail hon di wajah

One guy fails in his class test and a master asks in Punjabi "oye ki gall padh ke kyon ni aaya sahi sahi dass tere paniaah ne nahin taan" and the poor guy explains

Gall master ji kal kujj ehdaan hoyi si,
main kitaab chakk ke padan baitheya hi si,
ohdron mammi meri ne kitti bjaar di tyaar hoyi si,
te bjaar jaandeyaan mainu kuj kamm keh gayi si,

Keh gayi si das minute bad gas band kar dayin,
Baahr paani di awwaz aave taan motor chad dayin,
pinki noon satt waje tuition ton le aayin,
te jeep jadon lange dolu ch dudd pvaa layin,

par mainu master ji Noni ne waaj maar layi,
Kehndaa aa cricket kehediye bhai,
bass eithe hi master je mere kolon galti ho gayi,
Noni noon mere kolon naan nahin hoyi,

Main boohe Jindaa maar ke utth khadeyaa,
Siddha vich maidan de chapplan ch jaa wadeaa,
Jaande hi batting si te main jaa bat fadeyaa,
pata hi ni laageya phir kihde wele chann chadeya,

Mudeyaa haan taan mammi baar moore khadi si,
chappal ohne laa ke hatth ch hoyi phadi si,
main dekheyaa mammi nu badi garmi payi chadi si,
kunda kholyaa bas main phir lagg gayi jhadi si,

Rasoi jaa ke dekheaa daal saari macch si gayi,
utton tainki ch paini vi bhareyaa si nahin,
pinki rondi noon shiro chachi chadd ke gayi,
dudd waale di jeep vi chandri langg si gayi,

Bass master ji phir jo hona si ohio hoya,
meenh wareya chittran te mere kolon bacch ni hoya,
Pihlaa mammi ne mainu rajj ke kutteya,
phir baapu ji jadon aaye  kutt ktaapa hor vi hoya,

Mammi ne mere kolon phir cooker manj vaaya,
Ohdon baad phir bjaaron dudd laike aaya,
Mandar de naklon ton baaltiaan bhar ke liyaaya,
Pinki russi noon phir ghaintaa lai ke mnaaaya,

Bass master ji ohdon baad phir bheh khad na hoya,
Sareer da kalla kalla ang jaar jaar royaa,
kitaab chakk ke pad lavaan kayi waar socheyaa,
Par master ji kitaab chakk ke pad nahin hoya.
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
Master ne kol blaa ke do maarian kann te kihnda jaa picche jaa ke bhai jaa gandi aulaad..

Navin Ammi

Ikk din raano noon,
us di ammi ne bada hi kutteyaa,
itna kutteyaa,itna kutteyaa,
kutt kutt bhann hi sutteya.

Rondi rondi raano utth ke,
vehdeyon kamre chali gayi,
aan de baapu noon shaam noon,
teri khair nahin kehndi rahi.

Shaam noon baapu jadd usda aaya,
haal hwaal usne usnu sunaaya,
moonh te unlgaa de nishaan,
sajji baanh te piya neel vikhaaya.

Dekh ke sun ke saara haal usda
baapu kehnda dhiye maadi hoyi,
aapne dhidd di aandar noon
kuttdi hai kadd maan ehdaan koi.

Te phir kehnda o meri raano dhiye,
kall isnu main sajaa diyaanga,
isnu puraane bjaar chadd aavanga,
te tainu navin ammi liya diyaanaga.

Baapu di eh gall sun ke,
raano hakki bakki reh gayi,
haan naa kujj vi bol saki na,
gall usde si dil te lagg gayi.

Te ekdam baapu di bukkal chon utth ke,
nange pairi rasoi wall daud payi,
chimbad gayi jaa maan apni naal,
te kehan laggi main hi kupati kalmoyi.

Kheer kheer kheer kheer,
kitne dina di main hi zidd si fadi hoyi,
te ajj toon itni mehnat naal jadd bnaayi,
meri hatth karni kaaran kise naseeb na hoyi.

Toon waar waar mainu kehndi rahi,
vehde ch zara kudiye khed sambhal ke,
kheer rakhi hoyi hai thandi hon noon,
dekhi kite patili theda lagg ke na palat je.

Gall teri main par unsuni kardi rahi,
kujj khyaal na kitta ke maan kujj kehndi payi,
te aakhar tainu jisda darr si,
mere pair di thokar naal patili muddh gayi.

Sunn ke baat usdi maa rano godi chakk layi,
te kehan laggi jehdi gayi so gayi,
dikhaa mainu tere kitthe kitthe laggi aa,
te chunni de palle naal sek den lagg payi.

Te phir kujj chir magro raano hassdi kehdi,
mud jaa aapne baapu paas khaloi,
te kehan laggi baapu rehan de navin ammi noon,
ehio theek hai isdi jagah ni lai sakdi koi.